The initial shock and awe of Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots has come and gone, and it's now time to reflect on Hideo Kojima's recently released opus. Though MGS4 is no doubt a stunning game and many would argue evidence for videogames being treated as art, it's by no means perfect. Having just completed the game and spent some time in Metal Gear Online, I'm here to share my gripes about the game. Being a long-time fan of the MGS series, it's frustrating to see MGS4 turn out the way that it did, but I suppose it is what it is. Be warned, I don't have any criticisms of the story, but I do discuss the gameplay in each Act of the game, so if you don't want anything spoiled, best to just move on.
1. No reason to be on the Playstation 3
Why is this game on the PS3 again, besides Sony likely throwing a ton of money at Konami to keep it exclusive? It doesn't utilize the Playstation 3's strengths at all. The previously shown SIXAXIS support is nonexistent in the final product, with only one small sequence that uses it, to poor effect at that. And don't tell me they needed the storage space for Blu-Ray. We all know it was merely an excuse for Kojima to use uncompressed audio throughout the game. Throw some lossy compression at the audio (that 99% of users will never notice) and this game could fit on a single dual-layer DVD.
First of all, why does anyone give a shit which athlete will be selected for the cover of a game? Are you hanging game boxes on your wall and kneeling before it on a daily basis? I don't know about you, but my game boxes go on a shelf, spine facing outward, so I rarely see the cover at all. When it comes time to open the box, my left hand is usually obscuring the cover as I pry it open, so once again, I don't really see the athlete.
Have you ever not purchased a game because of the athlete on the cover? Of course not. Has the appearance of a particular athlete on a cover swayed you into purchasing said game when you otherwise may have passed? No. Therefore, cover athlete announcements are ridiculous and useless, unless you happen to be the athlete involved and need a little extra spending money.
If you've followed my posting at all, you've figured out by now that I'm a big fan of Batman. The Dark Knight is easily my most anticipated movie of the year, and I'm trying to spread my love for all things Batman. As a challenge to myself and a service to you all, I set out to compile a list of the best Batman stories of all time, across all media. That includes movies, television, and of course, comics. I don't want to spoil the list, but suffice to say my choices will likely ruffle a few feathers, especially for some of the older Batman fans out there.
As a passionate subscriber of Netflix and avowed cinephile, I love movie lists, hoping to find some obscure film I can quickly add to my queue. The blog Berbecuta has compiled a list taken from a book by Steven Jay Schneider, titled 1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die.
It's a superb list, though I'm slightly besides myself as I have seen all but 6 of the movies, meaning I can die with a clear conscience in the not-too-distant-future.
With game reviewers still mopping up their collective ejaculate, you'd think GTA IV was the greatest game of all time. The amount of hyperbole showered on Rockstar's game was unparalleled, with nearly every critic unleashing a string of adjectives that cast GTA IV as the second coming of video gaming Christ. Once the initial euphoria of the graphics wears off, you soon realize that GTA IV doesn't evolve its inherent gameplay beyond that which has come before, and in a lot of respects, significantly less.
With a Metacritic score of 99%, one might think it impossible to find any faults with a game that has been equated with everything from Citizen Kane to The Godfather. Wrong.
If nothing else, Grand Theft Auto IV is a great media gateway for organizations to get free television time to spout their respective outrage towards the contents of the game. We've already had Mothers Against Drunk Driving issue a statement and some immigrant organization is bent out of shape, but I've come up with a list of 10 groups that have been suspiciously silent.
1. DMV
The Department of Motor Vehicles should condemn GTA IV for its horrible portrayal of licensed drivers. Apparently, the Liberty City branch of the DMV will give a license to anyone, evidenced by the total lack of Student Driver vehicles on city streets. In Liberty City, if you can afford the fee, you get a license. Simple as that.
Apparently, Top 10 Lists have not lost the ability to generate readership in the future, as evidenced by my recent time-hopping adventures that found me securing a few lists from popular publications.
Top 10 Unintentional Consequences of Being Immortal
1. No one can figure out when Social Security begins.
2. Recent Gamma-Ray Burst has charred Earth, making life here unappealing.
3. “Till death do us part” needs some re-wording.
4. Ancient videogames that allowed your character to die are seeing a massive wave of nostalgia.
5. You've surfed every page on Universe-Net.
6. No easy answer for the question, “What's the worst that could happen?”
7. You're bored.
8. The word “procrastination” has lost all meaning.
9. Everything that annoys you will annoy you forever.
10. What hell is going to happen when the Universe collapses?
First, a disclaimer: I haven't played a better multiplayer first-person shooter since Counter-Strike. I love Call of Duty 4 and play every single night on the Xbox 360. But my love for the game doesn't mean I'm blind to a ton of problems that I think suck. Not all of these problems are the blame of the game, as several involve the people who play it, but it still counts!
Beg to differ? Did I miss additional suckiness? Let us know by posting in the comments.
Weapons Poke Through Walls
I think I'm hidden behind a wall. Suddenly, I'm under fire and, eventually, dead. How did the enemy know where I am when their UAV isn't activated? The answer comes when watching the Kill-Cam, as you suddenly witness your weapon somehow poking through solid matter, inadvertently exposing your whereabouts. For a game that allows people to shoot through walls, this is a pretty nasty bug.
I make no secret of my unbridled love for Battlestar Galactica. Great acting, superb plots, top-notch special-effects, twists and turns, but above all else: excellent dialog.
With the Season 4 premiere inching its way towards us, I thought I'd collect some of my favorite quotes from the first three seasons, presented in order of greatness. Beg to differ? Did I miss something obvious? Let me know in the comments and share some of your favorites.
“You're full of bile, hatred, poison. And I know that it has something to do with Ellen. And I'm sorry for that. And if you need time, Saul, well, you take all the time you want. But I gotta run a ship. The last thing I need is a one-eyed drunk sitting down here sowing discontent and disobedience. So I'll tell you once again, Saul. You can pick up that weapon and kill me...or you can get your ass back into your quarters, and not leave until you're ready to act like the man that I've known for the past thirty years.” --Commander Adama
In September 2002, the UK’s Faiz Chopdat was jailed for four months for playing Tetris on his mobile phone while on a flight home, “endangering the safety of an aircraft”. Cabin staff warned Chopdat twice to turn off the game and he was arrested on touching down in Manchester, UK.
Largest upright arcade machine
An arcade machine measuring 4.11 m (13 ft 6 in) tall, 2.84 m (9 ft 4 in) deep and 1.72 m (5 ft 8 in wide) was created by G4’s Attack of the Show! and Cinnabar and unveiled in Los Angeles, California, USA, on 9 November 2007. It weighs 680 kg (1,500 lb) and can play 150 different games on a screen measuring 1.82 m (6 ft). The man and woman in this picture are not giants - they’re standing on step ladders!
I'm pretty sure I can beat about half of those. Ok, maybe not, but it's cool to think about. Follow the source for the full list.
According to Lifehackery, there are 50 useful things you can do with tennis balls. Interestingly, tennis is not one of the 50. I had no idea these things were so multifaceted. I can now gaze upon a can of unopened tennis balls with newfound respect, realizing the endless possibilities awaiting within.
34) Keep the yuckiness out of your pool by floating some tennis balls in the water. Supposedly, the balls will absorb body oils from people who swim in the water - but you need to replace them every few weeks to keep them fresh.
Now what I find fascinating in this feature is that it abolishes the one use for tennis balls I had confidence in, namely, a dog toy. Wrong!
Some words of caution: tennis balls should not be used as dog toys. The felt that covers them can wear down a dog’s teeth. Larger dogs can choke on tennis balls. Ask your veterinarian for advice on alternative toys.
Today we present to you our picks for the greatest time travel stories ever created. All mediums were considered, including film, television, print, and video games. Some of them are timeless (no pun intended) classics and known by all, but we've got a couple of surprises in store for you as well. Tell us your favorites that we might have left out in the Comments section! Let's get the ball rolling with a film that falls in the former category, and is definitely a safe choice.
Back to the Future
Ask anyone who followed pop culture in the 80s to name their favorite time-traveling story, and chances are they'll say Back to the Future. This classic film by Robert Zemeckis and Steven Spielberg manages to define two separate generations, one being the youth of the 1980s, and other being the baby-boomers of the mid-1950s, when teenagers began to develop a culture all their own.
The story follows Marty McFly as he travels back in time 30 years via his friend Dr. Emmett Brown's time-traveling DeLorean. Leaving his original time of 1985, Marty is lost and confused in an era that seems completely incongruous to the world he left behind. Not only is the culture alien to him, Marty struggles to avoid changing historical events, including the catalyst moment of his parents' relationship. In a perfect example of the grandfather paradox, Marty must figure out a way to return to 1985, but at the same time ensure that his parents meet, fall in love, and later have him as a child. Otherwise his entire existence is in danger. Back to the Future received two sequels, and though some will argue the quality of the films, the series remains entertaining throughout. -mb
Just because an animal is on the Endangered Species list doesn't mean the world wouldn't be a better place without it. Cracked has compiled a list of 6 species that need a push in the wrong direction. Not only do they list them, they give us suggestions on how we could finish them off.
#6. Goliath Bird Eating Spider
It's frequently described as "larger than a dinner plate," presumably because spider-scientists don't want to freak people out with the significantly more relevant "big enough to fit over your face." It's a foot across and, when it's in the mood, brings down entire birds and eats them. It doesn't make webs, or leap great distances--it just slowly sneaks up behind things and jumps on them. Yes, just like in your nightmares. Go ahead and check behind you. We'll wait.
Before you start arguing about the potential harm to the ecosystem, imagine one of these crawling on your face while you sleep. You might not care so much about the ecosystem then. Follow the source for more on the Goliath Bird Eating Spider and the other 5 candidates for extermination.
My love for Rock Band knows no equal, but that doesn't mean I'm blind to its defects. The more obsessed I become, the more the little (and not so little) things bother me. Nothing I'm about to bitch about can't be fixed or addressed, assuming Harmonix is paying attention. At least the latest patch brought us the superb in-game music store, which does kick much ass, but there are still issues I'd like to see solved before I'm forced to buy Rock Band II.
1. Multiplayer Downloadable Content
I'm one of those nuts who has purchased every single damn song for Rock Band. I even had to move to the larger hard drive because the writing was on the wall for the 20-giger. As much as I love all of the downloadable content, there is one glaring problem that drives me nuts: I seldom find anyone online to play with in a Quickplay multiplayer match.
The folks over at Harmonix have totally dropped the ball on this front and it's unfortunate. In a perfect world, Rock Band would group players based on their DLC purchases so they can actually play these new songs online. As it stands, it's pure blind luck if you stumble upon someone with the same songs, ultimately hurting the value of these purchases.
Evil Robots rule, of that I think we're all in agreement. The fact that we now have an Evil Robot by the name of Dextre poised for attack on the International Space Station means their day of dominance is just around the corner.
Celebrating our imminent demise at the hands of our creations, Mahalo has put together an impressive list of famous Evil Robots as they've appeared in movies and television, complete with video clips of each in action.
Some of the entries are bound to reignite long-dormant memories, like the Bigfoot robot in The Six Million Dollar Man, which I had completely forgotten about.
Yes, he was a robot. Capitalizing on the Bigfoot phenomenon of the 1970s, the writers of the Six Million Dollar Man decided to make Bigfoot the creation of a research team of aliens. Bigfoot would have two encore performances before the end of the series with The Return of Bigfoot and Bigfoot V. A final curtain call came when Jaime Sommers encountered Bigfoot on yet another Return of Bigfoot. It turns out Sasquatch decided to stay on earth and is in the process of becoming an organic being, half good, but still half robot.
Ask anyone who followed pop culture in the 80s to name their favorite time-traveling story, and chances are they'll say Back to the Future. This classic film by Robert Zemeckis and Steven Spielberg manages to define two separate generations, one being the youth of the 1980s, and other being the baby-boomers of the mid-1950s, when teenagers began to develop a culture all their own.
